I got a call from Clarke today, well technically yesterday. I will call them first thing today when I wake up after I go to sleep. I am beyond stressed out and that is one thing I can stop worrying about. I will most likely be in the first orientation April 9th, thank god because I need the money. So after that I will be busy busy busy, and will rarely hangout during the week. Just a fair warning to anyone who cares.
One thing I am stressed out about is this guy, who is unlike any other guy I have ever met. He is the complete opposite of what I usually look for, which maybe that is a good thing. But for once in my life I can't really explain how he makes me feel...and it sucks that it can't happen right now...or in my eyes ever. I am already trying to find the negatives so I can just give up and walk away with some pride. I don't know what to do and I really wasn't interested in a relationship anytime soon untill I met him. It is hard to explain and I am sure everyone who has to listen to me talk about thinks I am a complete moron. Which I am, because it will probably never happen, which is why I am glad I start working soon so I wont lose anymore sleep about this subject. I will be so busy with work I will hopefully forget all about him period. Maybe that is selfish of me, but I can't do this anymore, not after my last fling(i didn't want it to be a fling) he was so amazign the first night then just turned into the meanest guy I will ever ever be with. I am sick of being mislead, and to be honest I just can't emotionally handle it.